1 Become good, casual friends with the girl in question. Don’t call her every day and talk for hours. When you talk to her, be sincere, honest, and entertaining when you run into her downtown, or in class, or at a coffee shop. Get to know her in moderation; if you over exert yourself trying to get to know her, you will increase the risk that you seem dependent or clingy.
2 Get to know her friends. We humans are social creatures, and often, our close friends are good representatives of how we ourselves are; e.g., if one of her close friends lies and deceives on a regular basis, keep that behavior in mind. A girl might not be the one for you if she and her friends are frequently dishonest.
3 Look for the opportunity to suggest going somewhere, just the two of you. This opportunity is best taken advantage of at a time when both of you are laughing, smiling, or otherwise having a good time. Do not meekly ask if she wants to go; instead, suggest that you both go somewhere together. e.g.: “I know this great restaurant downtown. Let’s go there together on Friday!” If she seems uneasy, she may not find you attractive, or she may not be sure of her own feelings. This is a fact of life. If you are truly being yourself, and the two of you clearly enjoy each other’s company, she may simply not be interested in you beyond friendship. Accept it and move on, staying friends with her. If she accepts your suggestion, congratulations.
4 Make your intentions with your first date clear from the get-go. Understand that your first date, but more specifically, how you yourself approach it, is the most important way to tell if a girl is right for you. In order to get an accurate perspective of what a girl is truly like, you must present yourself as the confident, cool person that you know yourself to be. (If you are uncomfortable with yourself, it will be hard to tell who is right for you, since most girls don’t date insecure people).
5 Make it explicitly clear that you’re going on a date, and are not going just “as friends”. Clarify with a joke. An example for a girl with a good sense of humor is, “So, when do you want to take it to the next level – before, or after dinner? **wink, wink** I might not have time before.” This type of comment can lead the conversation into brief seriousness to clarify that you want a date, and prevents the awkwardness of simply bringing up the topic for no good reason.
6 Dont hesitate to compliment her, even a simple “Your eyes look pretty” could set you up for a relationship but dont sound too obsessive or she’ll think you’re creepy.
7 Judge how easily and comfortably you are able to talk with her about both trivial and serious issues. A long, successful relationship relies almost exclusively on good conversation. If you find yourself struggling to find something to talk about – not out of nervousness, but simply because you’ve both “run out of things to say” – then she may not be the one for you. However, if the two of you feel no pressure, and can simply enjoy each other’s company and the date itself, then you’ve found yourself a pretty good woman!
8 Understand that maintaining the relationship becomes harder as time goes on. More and more annoying things about both of you are revealed over time. Maybe she discovered you bite your nails. Maybe she doesn’t wash her hair often, or flirts with your friends. If you are able to confront your partner easily about these sorts of annoying traits, and either correct the trait outright, or simply choose to laugh with/at your partner instead, you’ve found yourself a great woman and a great relationship. If you are unable to confront your partner easily, your relationship might not last that long.
9 Once you’ve passed the one year mark, it should be pretty clear whether or not this person is right for you. Arguments will occur, surely, but you will be able to simmer down and resolve the conflict without much trouble.
10 It takes time… a lot of time…
11 But remember, even if it takes a lot of time, once you are with her, it will be worth the wait
Learn to be ourself around everyone you know. Above all things, in any social situation – you have to become comfortable with who you are. Achieving self-understanding is the best way to demonstrate confidence, a trait that nearly all women find to be attractive. While this suggestion is merely listed as a tip, consider it to be a fundamental part not just in these steps of finding out what girl is the one for you, but for success in life as a whole.
Remember birthdays, anniversaries, and the things in life that she loves above all else. Don’t make a huge deal out of remembering these dates and her favorites – but every once and awhile, surprise her with something that shows you are aware of what she wants. Don’t make these surprises habitual, or you will seem clingy or obsessive.
Do not pretend to be someone you are not, just be yourself.
Try to avoid women who like to get excessive attention; they are often shallow and manipulative, and almost always insecure.
Women are used to men putting on a different persona around females they are attracted to, so do not “act” any differently around the girl. Stay true to how you are around everyone else. Tease her, flirt with her – but hold nothing back. Most importantly, enjoy being in your own skin and being in her company. Women will know when you are a genuine person by demonstrating confidence, and there’s nothing sexier than a man who knows who he is and what he wants.
When you get to know a woman, especially someone you might think is “the one”, you want to Truly engage in real conversations, and that requires listening. Avoid talking about yourself incessantly. Ask her questions that you’d only be able to ask by knowing new information she revealed in her conversation. If you’re not sure of what to ask, simply ask her how she felt at a specific time in her story or anecdote, and why she felt that way. She will appreciate that you understand her.
Smiling and nodding to her is not ever an option unless you’re having a very serious conversation and interruption would be rude.
Depending on how old you are, this could be your future wife so pick wisely.
If you are young, don’t rush into the intimate part of the relationship.
Do not ever be mean with her, never fall out with her, she will think you’re ‘insecure’
Compliments are good, but make sure that they’re not always on how sexy she is. While most girls enjoy being told that they’re sexy in the heat of the moment, constantly commenting on her body will make her feel like a sexual object, rather than a girlfriend or future wife.
EditThings you’ll need